Memorial Day Is More Than Just a Long Weekend

By Brea O’Donnell

Memorial Day weekend is the unofficial start of summer. We start grilling again, we sport white pants, and after a long winter, we collectively exhale and let the good times roll.

But before we dive headfirst into sunshine and spiked seltzer, it’s important to pause to remember why we enjoy this holiday, and why it’s not the same as Veterans Day. Because if you’re anything like me, you’ve probably said “Happy Memorial Day!” without thinking twice. We’ve been conditioned to treat it like a mini Fourth of July, complete with pool parties, flag cake, and 30% off sales. And while enjoying life, family, and freedom is exactly what our fallen warriors fought to preserve, the spirit of Memorial Day isn’t festivity. It’s remembrance.

Veterans Day is for honoring all who served, whether in war or peace. We thank living veterans for their service. Memorial Day, on the other hand, is sacred space. It’s a day set apart to give thoughtful tribute to those who didn’t come home. The ones who gave the ultimate sacrifice, the last measure of devotion, in defense of our great nation.

My dad was a Marine. Some of the men he trained with served in combat, and a few never returned from conflict. I grew up understanding that Memorial Day had a distinct sobriety.

I saw someone online share that her brother had died in service. “My family, like many others, was changed forever from our loss. It is NOT a happy holiday,” she wrote.

Another woman mentioned that she had just lost a military family member three weeks ago. “We will honor his sacrifice and this holiday with thoughtful reflection forever.”

When people show that raw vulnerability, it reminds that this day still carries real weight. So how do we practice reverence without becoming somber or stiff? We remember. We reflect. And then we live well. We take a moment at the beginning of the weekend to pray for the families still grieving. We teach our kids (and gently remind our group chats) that freedom isn’t free. We pause at 3 p.m. on Monday, the National Moment of Remembrance, and offer a prayer of gratitude.

And yes, we still go to the barbecue. Because living joyfully is a beautiful way to honor the people who died protecting our right to do just that. Memorial Day isn’t about guilt. It’s about grounding. It’s about holding space for both the sadness and the sunshine. And honestly, women are uniquely gifted at that. We’re good at remembering birthdays and death anniversaries, holding tension between the now and the not-yet, keeping meaningful things in our hearts while cherishing the blessings of today.

So maybe this weekend, we lead with that quiet sense of care. We set the tone. Just a few words of intention can mean everything.

The Toast, Not Just the Photo

There’s nothing wrong with posting the burger, the outfit, or the beach day. That’s part of what makes this country so worth protecting—the freedom to enjoy simple things and share them with the people we love. But somewhere in between the posts and the plans, it’s worth taking a quiet moment to remember the heroes who never got to reunite with their loved ones. The ones who traded their futures so we could live ours.

At 3pm on Monday, during the National Moment of Remembrance, we pause. Because freedom isn’t a vibe. It’s a sacrifice. And that’s worth remembering.

The Gentle Reminder

Women tend to remember the details. We light the candles and write the notes. Maybe that’s our role this weekend too—to quietly remind people what the day is really about. Share a name or story. Keep it simple, but let it mean something. Gratitude doesn’t need to be dramatic. It just needs to be acknowledged.

So This Weekend...

Yes, wear the sundress. Take the photo. Eat the burger. Splash in the pool. But let there be a solemn prayer. A toast that’s more than surface-level. A breath that remembers someone else’s last. Because Memorial Day isn’t just the beginning of summer. It represents the price that was paid for our nation to endure and flourish in peace. Let’s not forget that.

Brea O’Donnell is a lifelong Catholic and conservative, born and raised in Connecticut and now based in South Florida. She’s passionate about faith, femininity, and preserving what is true and beautiful in culture. You can find her on Instagram at @breaodonnell.